安徒生童话-第13章
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〃Well； well；〃 he said； and with that he walked out of the room。 Hewho filled her every thought！ he whom she loved best； and who washer whole earthly pride！
Anne Lisbeth went forth from the castle into the public road；feeling mournful and sad； he whom she had nursed day and night； andeven now carried about in her dreams； had been cold and strange； andhad not a word or thought respecting her。 A great black raven darteddown in front of her on the high road； and croaked dismally。
〃Ah；〃 said she； 〃what bird of ill omen art thou？〃 Presently shepassed the laborer's hut； his wife stood at the door； and the twowomen spoke to each other。
〃You look well；〃 said the woman； 〃you're fat and plump； you arewell off。〃
〃Oh yes；〃 answered Anne Lisbeth。
〃The boat went down with them；〃 continued the woman； 〃Hans theskipper and the boy were both drowned； so there's an end of them。 Ialways thought the boy would be able to help me with a few dollars。He'll never cost you anything more； Anne Lisbeth。〃
〃So they were drowned；〃 repeated Anne Lisbeth； but she said nomore； and the subject was dropped。 She felt very low…spirited； becauseher count…child had shown no inclination to speak to her who loved himso well； and who had travelled so far to see him。 The journey had costmoney too； and she had derived no great pleasure from it。 Still shesaid not a word of all this； she could not relieve her heart bytelling the laborer's wife； lest the latter should think she did notenjoy her former position at the castle。 Then the raven flew over her；screaming again as he flew。
〃The black wretch！〃 said Anne Lisbeth； 〃he will end by frighteningme today。〃 She had brought coffee and chicory with her； for shethought it would be a charity to the poor woman to give them to her toboil a cup of coffee； and then she would take a cup herself。
The woman prepared the coffee； and in the meantime Anne Lisbethseated her in a chair and fell asleep。 Then she dreamed of somethingwhich she had never dreamed before； singularly enough she dreamed ofher own child； who had wept and hungered in the laborer's hut； and hadbeen knocked about in heat and in cold； and who was now lying in thedepths of the sea； in a spot only known by God。 She fancied she wasstill sitting in the hut； where the woman was busy preparing thecoffee； for she could smell the coffee…berries roasting。 Butsuddenly it seemed to her that there stood on the threshold abeautiful young form； as beautiful as the count's child； and thisapparition said to her； 〃The world is passing away； hold fast to me；for you are my mother after all； you have an angel in heaven； holdme fast；〃 and the child…angel stretched out his hand and seized her。Then there was a terrible crash； as of a world crumbling to pieces；and the angel…child was rising from the earth； and holding her bythe sleeve so tightly that she felt herself lifted from the ground；but； on the other hand； something heavy hung to her feet and draggedher down； and it seemed as if hundreds of women were clinging toher； and crying； 〃If thou art to be saved； we must be saved too。Hold fast； hold fast。〃 And then they all hung on her； but there weretoo many； and as they clung the sleeve was torn； and Anne Lisbeth felldown in horror； and awoke。 Indeed she was on the point of falling overin reality with the chair on which she sat； but she was so startledand alarmed that she could not remember what she had dreamed； onlythat it was something very dreadful。
They drank their coffee and had a chat together； and then AnneLisbeth went away towards the little town where she was to meet thecarrier； who was to drive her back to her own home。 But when shecame to him she found that he would not be ready to start till theevening of the next day。 Then she began to think of the expense； andwhat the distance would be to walk。 She remembered that the route bythe sea…shore was two miles shorter than by the high road； and asthe weather was clear； and there would be moonlight； she determined tomake her way on foot； and to start at once； that she might reachhome the next day。
The sun had set； and the evening bells sounded through the airfrom the tower of the village church； but to her it was not the bells；but the cry of the frogs in the marshes。 Then they ceased； and allaround became still； not a bird could be heard； they were all at rest；even the owl had not left her hiding place； deep silence reigned onthe margin of the wood by the sea…shore。 As Anne Lisbeth walked on shecould hear her own footsteps in the sands； even the waves of the seawere at rest； and all in the deep waters had sunk into silence。There was quiet among the dead and the living in the deep sea。 AnneLisbeth walked on； thinking of nothing at all； as people say； orrather her thoughts wandered； but not away from her； for thought isnever absent from us； it only slumbers。 Many thoughts that have laindormant are roused at the proper time； and begin to stir in the mindand the heart； and seem even to e upon us from above。 It iswritten； that a good deed bears a blessing for its fruit； and it isalso written； that the wages of sin is death。 Much has been said andmuch written which we pass over or know nothing of。 A light ariseswithin us； and then forgotten things make themselves remembered； andthus it was with Anne Lisbeth。 The germ of every vice and every virtuelies in our heart； in yours and in mine； they lie like little grainsof seed； till a ray of sunshine； or the touch of an evil hand； oryou turn the corner to the right or to the left； and the decision ismade。 The little seed is stirred； it swells and shoots up； and poursits sap into your blood； directing your course either for good orevil。 Troublesome thoughts often exist in the mind； fermentingthere； which are not realized by us while the senses are as it wereslumbering； but still they are there。 Anne Lisbeth walked on thus withher senses half asleep； but the thoughts were fermenting within her。
From one Shrove Tuesday to another； much may occur to weigh downthe heart； it is the reckoning of a whole year； much may be forgotten；sins against heaven in word and thought； sins against our neighbor；and against our own conscience。 We are scarcely aware of theirexistence； and Anne Lisbeth did not think of any of her errors。 Shehad mitted no crime against the law of the land； she was anhonorable person； in a good position… that she knew。
She continued her walk along by the margin of the sea。 What was itshe saw lying there？ An old hat； a man's hat。 Now when might that havebeen washed overboard？ She drew nearer； she stopped to look at thehat； 〃Ha！ what was lying yonder？〃 She shuddered； yet it was nothingsave a heap of grass and tangled seaweed flung across a long stone；but it looked like a corpse。 Only tangled grass； and yet she wasfrightened at it。 As she turned to walk away； much came into hermind that she had heard in her childhood： old superstitions ofspectres by the sea…shore； of the ghosts of drowned but unburiedpeople； whose corpses had been washed up on the desolate beach。 Thebody； she knew； could do no harm to any one； but the spirit couldpursue the lonely wanderer； attach itself to him； and demand to becarried to the churchyard； that it might rest in consecrated ground。〃Hold fast！ hold fast！〃 the spectre would cry； and as Anne Lisbethmurmured these words to herself； the whole of her dream was suddenlyrecalled to her memory； when the mother had clung to her； anduttered these words； when； amid the crashing of worlds； her sleeve hadbeen torn； and she had slipped from the grasp of her child； who wantedto hold her up in that terrible hour。 Her child； her own child；which she had never loved； lay now buried in the sea； and might riseup； like a spectre； from the waters； and cry； 〃Hold fast； carry meto consecrated ground！〃
As these thoughts passed through her mind； fear gave speed toher feet； so that she walked faster and faster。 Fear came upon heras if a cold； clammy hand had been laid upon her heart； so that shealmost fainted。 As she looked across the sea； all there grew darker； aheavy mist came rolling onwards； and clung to bush and tree；distorting them into fantastic shapes。 She turned and glanced at themoon； which had risen behind her。 It looked like a pale； raylesssurface； and a deadly weight seemed to hang upon her limbs。 〃Hold；〃thought she； and then she turned round a second time to look at themoon。 A white face appeared quite close to her； with a mist； hanginglike a garment from its shoulders。 〃Stop！ carry me to consecratedearth；〃 sounded in her ears； in strange； hollow tones。 The sound didnot e from frogs or ravens； she saw no sign of such creatures。 〃Agrave！ dig me a grave！〃 was repeated quite loud。 Yes； it was indeedthe spectre of her child。 The child that lay beneath the ocean； andwhose spirit could have no rest until it was carried to thechurchyard； and until a grave had been dug for it in consecratedground。 She would go there at once； and there she would dig。 Sheturned in the direction of the church； and the weight on her heartseemed to grow lighter； and even to vanish altogether； but when sheturned to go home by the shortest way； it returned。 〃Stop！ stop！〃and the words came quite clear； though they were like the croak of afrog； or the wail of a bird。 〃A grave！ dig me a
