高山上的呼喊-go tell it on the mountain-第22章

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　　‘That　sure　is　a　sorry　little　boy。’
　　He　would　weep　again；　his　heart　insisted；　for　now　his　weeping　had　begun；　he　would　rageagain；　said　the　shifting　air；　for　the　lions　of　rage　had　been　unloosed；　he　would　be　in　darkness　again；in　fire　again；　now　that　he　had　seen　the　fire　and　the　darkness。　He　was　free—whom　the　Son　sets　freeis　free　indeed—he　had　only　to　stand　fast　in　his　liberty。　He　was　in　battle　no　longer；　this　unfoldingLord’s　day；　with　this　avenue；　these　houses；　the　sleeping；　staring；　shouting　people；　but　had　enteredinto　battle　with　Jacob’s　angel；　with　the　princes　and　the　powers　of　the　air。　And　he　was　filled　with　ajoy；　a　joy　unspeakable；　whose　roots；　though　he　would　not　trace　then　on　this　new　day　of　his　life；were　nourished　by　the　wellspring　of　a　despair　not　yet　discovered。　The　joy　of　the　Lord　is　thestrength　of　His　people。　Where　joy　was；　there　strength　followed；　where　strength　was；　sorrow　came—for　ever？　For　ever　and　for　ever；　said　the　arm　of　Elisha；　heavy　on　his　shoulder。　And　John　tried　tosee　through　the　morning　wall；　to　stare　past　the　bitter　houses；　to　tear　the　thousand　gray　veils　of　thesky　away；　and　look　into　that　heart—the　monstrous　heart　which　beat　for　ever；　turning　the　astoundeduniverse；　manding　the　stars　to　flee　away　before　the　sun’s　red　sandal；　bidding　the　moon　to　waxand　wane；　and　disappear；　and　e　again；　with　a　silver　　holding　back　the　sea；　and　out　ofmysteries　abysmal；　re…creating；　each　day；　the　earth。　That　heart；　that　breath；　without　which　was　notanything　made　which　was　made。　Tears　came　into　his　eyes　again；　making　the　avenue　shiver；causing　the　houses　to　shake—his　heart　swelled；　lifted　up；　faltered；　and　was　dumb。　Out　of　joystrength　came；　strength　that　was　fashioned　to　bear　sorrow；　sorrow　brought　forth　joy。　For　ever？　Thiswas　Ezekiel’s　wheel；　in　the　middle　of　the　burning　air　for　ever—and　the　little　wheel　ran　by　faith；and　the　big　wheel　ran　by　the　grace　of　God。
　　‘Elisha？’　he　said。
　　‘If　you　ask　Him　to　bear　you　up；’　said　Elisha；　as　though　he　had　read　his　thoughts；　‘He　won’tnever　let　you　fall。’
　　　‘It　was　you；’　he　said；　‘wasn’t　it；　who　prayed　me　through？’
　　‘We　was　all　praying；　little　brother；’　said　Elisha；　with　a　smile；　‘but　yes；　I　was　right　over　youthe　whole　time。　Look　like　the　Lord　had　put　you　like　a　burden　on　my　soul。’
　　‘Was　I　praying　long？’　he　asked。
　　Elisha　laughed。　‘Well；　you　started　praying　when　it　was　night　and　you　ain’t　stopped　prayingtill　it　was　morning。　That’s　a　right　smart　time；　it　seems　to　me。’
　　John　smiled；　too；　observing　with　some　wonder　that　a　saint　of　God　could　laugh。
　　‘Was　you　glad；’　he　asked；　‘to　see　me　at　the　altar？’
　　Then　he　wondered　why　he　had　asked　this；　and　hoped　Elisha　would　no　think　him　foolish。
　　‘I　was　mighty　glad；’　said　Elisha　soberly；　‘to　see　little　Johnny　lay　his　sins　on　the　altar；　layhis　life　on　the　altar　and　rise　up；　praising　God。’
　　Something　shivered　in　him　as　the　word　sin　was　spoken。　Tears　sprang　to　his　eyes　again。
　　‘Oh；’　he　said；　‘I　pray　God；　I　pray　the　Lord　…　to　make　me　strong　…　to　sanctify　me　wholly　…　andkeep　me　saved！’
　　‘Yes；’　said　Elisha；　‘you　keep　that　spirit；　and　I　now　the　Lord’s　going　to　see　to　it　that　you　gethome　all　right。’
　　‘It’s　a　long　way；’　John　said　slowly；　‘ain’t　it？　It’s　a　hard　way。　It’s　uphill　all　the　way。’
　　‘You　remember　Jesus；’　Elisha　said。　‘You　keep　your　mind　on　Jesus。　He　went　that　way—upthe　steep　side　of　the　mountain—and　He　was　carrying　the　cross；　and　didn’t　nobody　help　Him。　Hewent　that　way　for　us。　He　carried　that　cross　for　us。’
　　‘But　He　was　the　Son　of　God；’　said　John；　‘and　He　knew　it。’
　　‘He　knew　it；’　said　Elisha；　‘because　He　was　willing　to　pay　the　price。　Don’t　you　know　it；Johnny？　Ain’t　you　willing　to　pay　the　price？’
　　‘That　song　they　sing；’　said　John；　finally；　‘if　it　costs　my　life—is　that　the　price？’
　　‘Yes。’　said　Elisha；　‘that’s　the　price。’
　　Then　John　was　silent；　wanting　to　put　the　question　another　way。　And　the　silence　wascracked；　suddenly；　by　an　ambulance　siren；　and　a　crying　bell。　And　they　both　look　up　as　theambulance　raced　past　them　on　the　avenue　on　which　no　creature　moved；　save　for　the　saints　of　Godbehind　them。
　　‘But　that’s　the　Devil’s　price；　too；’　said　Elisha；　as　silence　came　again。　‘The　Devil；　he　don’task　for　nothing　less　than　your　life。　And　he　take　it；　too；　and　it’s　lost　for　ever。　For　ever；　Johnny。　Youin　darkness　while　you　living　and　you　in　darkness　when　you　dead。　Ain’t　nothing　but　the　love　ofGod　can　make　the　darkness　light。’
　　‘Yes；’　said　John；　‘I　remember。　I　remember。’
　　　‘Yes；’　said　Elisha；　‘but　you　got　to　remember　when　the　evil　day　es；　when　the　floodrises；　boy；　and　looks　like　your　soul　is　going　under。　You　got　to　remember　when　the　devil’s　doing　allhe　can　to　make　you　forget。’
　　‘The　Devil；’　he　said；　frowning　and　staring；　‘the　Devil。　How　many　faces　is　the　Devil　got？’
　　‘He　got　as　many　faces；’　Elisha　said；’　as　you　going　to　see　between　now　and　the　time　you　layyour　burden　down。　And　he　got　a　lot　more　than　that；　but　ain’t　nobody　seen　them　all。’
　　‘Except　Jesus；’　John　said　then。　‘Only　Jesus。’
　　‘Yes；’　said　Elisha；　with　a　grave；　sweet　smile；　‘that’s　the　Man　you　got　to　call　on。　That’s　theMan　who　knows。’
　　They　were　approaching　his　house—his　father’s　house。　In　a　moment　he　must　leave　Elisha；step　out　from　under　his　protecting　arm；　and　walk　alone　into　the　house—alone　with　his　mother　andhis　father。　And　he　was　afraid。　He　wanted　to　stop　and　turn　to　Elisha；　and　tell　him　…　something　forwhich　he　found　no　words。
　　‘Elisha——’　he　began；　and　looked　into　Elisha’s　face。　Then：　‘You　pray　for　me？　Please　prayfor　me？’
　　‘I　been　praying；　little　brother；’　Elisha　said；　‘and　I　sure　ain’t　going　to　stop　praying　now。’
　　‘For　me；’　persisted　John；　his　tears　falling；　‘for　me。’
　　‘You　know　right　well；’　said　Elisa；　looking　at　him；　‘I　ain’t　going　to　stop　praying　for　thebrother　what　the　Lord　done　give　me。’
　　Then　they　reached　the　house；　and　paused；　looking　at　each　other；　waiting。　John　saw　that　thesun　was　beginning　to　stir；　somewhere　in　the　sky；　the　silence　of　the　dawn　would　soon　give　way　tothe　trumpets　of　the　morning。　Elisha　took　his　arm　from　John’s　shoulder　and　stood　beside　him；looking　backward。　And　John　looked　back；　seeing　the　saints　approach。
　　‘Service　is　going　to　be　mighty　late　this　morning；’　Elisha　said；　and　suddenly　grinned　andyawned。
　　And　John　laughed。　‘But　you　be　there；’　he　asked；　‘won’t　you？　This　morning？’
　　‘Yes；　little　brother；’　Elisha　laughed；　‘I’m　going　to　be　there。　I　see　I’m　going　to　have　to　dosome　running　to　keep　up　with　you。’
　　And　they　watched　the　saints。　Now　they　all　stood　on　the　corner；　where　his　Aunt　Florencehad　stopped　to　say　good…bye。　All　the　women　talked　together；　while　his　father　stood　a　little　apart。
　　His　aunt　and　his　mother　kissed　each　other；　as　he　had　seen　them　do　a　hundred　times；　and　then　hisaunt　turned　to　look　for　them；　and　waved。
　　They　waved　back；　and　she　started　slowly　across　the　street；　moving；　he　thought　withwonder；　like　an　old　woman。
　　‘Well；　she　ain’t　going　to　be　out　to　service　this　morning；　I　tell　you　that；’　said　Elisha；　andyawned　again。
　　‘And　look　like　you　going　to　be　half　asleep；’　John　said　‘Now　don’t　you　mess　with　me　this　morning；’　Elisha　said；　‘because　you　ain’t　got　so　holy　Ican’t　turn　you　over　my　knee。　I’s　your　big　brother　in　the　Lord—you　just　remember　that。’
　　Now　they　were　on　the　near　corner。　His　father　and　mother　were　saying　good…bye　to　PrayingMother　Washington；　and　Sister　McCandless；　and　Sister　Price。　The　praying　woman　waved　to　them；and　they　waved　back。　Then　his　mother　and　his　father　were　alone；　ing　toward　them‘Elisha；’　said　John；　‘Elisha。’
　　‘Yes；’　said　Elisha；　‘what　you　want　now？’
　　John；　staring　at　Elisha；　struggled　to　tell　him　something　more—struggled　to　say—all　thatcould　never　be　said。　Yet：　‘I　was　down　in　the　valley；’　he　dared；　‘I　was　by　myself　down　there。　Iwon’t　never　forget。　May　God　forget　me　if　I　forget。’
　　Then　his　mother　and　his　father　were　before　them。　His　mother　smiled；　and　took　Elisha’soutstretched　hand。
　　‘Praise　the　Lord　this　morning；’　said　Elisha。　‘He　done　give　us　something　to　praise　Him　for。’
　　‘Amen；’　said　his　mother；　praise　the　Lord！’
　　John　moved　up　to　the　short；　stone　step；　smiling　a　little；　looking　down　on　them。　His　motherpassed　him；　and　started　into　the　house。
　　‘You　better　e　on　upstairs；’　she　said；　still　smiling；　‘and　take　off　them　wet　clothes。　Don’twant　you　catching　cold。’
　　And　her　smile　remained　unreadable；　he　could　not　tell　what　it　hid。　And　to　escape　her　eyes；he　kissed　her；　saying；　‘Yes；　Mama。　I’m　ing。’
　　She　stood　behind　him；　in　the　doorway；　waiting。
　　‘Praise　the　Lord；　Deacon；’　Elisha　said。　‘See　you　at　the　morning　service；　Lord　willing。’
　　‘Amen；’　said　his　father；　‘praise　the　Lord。’　He　started　up　the　stone　steps；　staring　at　John；who　blocked　the　way。　‘Go　on　upstairs；　boy；’　he　said；　‘like　your　mother　told　you。’
　　John　looked　at　his　father　and　moved　from　his　path；　stepping　down　into　the　street　again。　Heput　his　hand　on　Elisha’s　arm；　feeling　himself　trembling；　and　his　father　at　his　back。
　　‘Elisha；’　he　said；　‘no　matter　what　happens　to　me；　wh